Full House of Love for Rent; Hell's Kitchen Included!

I have seen the future of theater, and it is Bitter Cocktail's Production of Full House: Live! We saw this innovative stage show last Saturday and I must say that it keeps the hope alive that theater will continue to thrive instead of die out with the senior citizens that are the largest demographic of patrons presently.

Full House: Live! takes 2 episodes from that the seminal sitcom’s heyday and gives it the edge it never had before. Michelle is played by a full-grown woman (credited to Leigh Ann “and Ashley” Brienza) and her actions and lines are delivered seeping with sexual innuendo. To complement her sex appeal is Jesse Katsopolis (John D’Alonzo) whose lasciviousness is focused mainly on Michelle although his lechery extends even to the insufferable next-door neighbor Kimmy Gibbler (Stephanie Kornick). Father Danny Tanner (Joseph Nevin) is never without his handy dishtowel, DJ (Damian Bellino) is played by a man and Uncle Joey (Amanda Damron) is a drag king, there is even a band that opened the show with the original theme song and provided dramatic music for Danny’s talks with his daughters. The character that really shined in her role was Alyssa Kondracki as Rebecca Donaldson. The lines are the same as in the actual TV show but Kondracki delivers them in such a way to over-emphasize the utter apathy that I now realize Rebecca characterized perfectly.

The beauty of this show lies in the many factors that differentiate it from classic theater. Cheap entry fee ($5), later starting time (10pm) with cash bar, and themed snacks such as cupcakes adorned with pictures of your favorite Full House character give the entire feel of the show a more laid-back vibe. Full House: Live! was sold out 30 minutes before the house opened (no pre-sale) and the humor appealed to a younger crowd. This night out was an afterthought for my boy and myself but we ended up laughing our arses off and dreaming up our own stage-shows…Saved by the Bell or Beverly Hills: 90210 perhaps??

Hell’s Kitchen has been in full-swing FURY since my favorite bastard Gordon Ramsay abruptly kicked Josh off mid-service 2 episodes ago (and good riddance!). To have Julia leave that same week was depressing but also inspiring as Ramsay is paying to send her to culinary school. That girl’s got hella talent and no doubt we will be seeing more of her in the future (I hope!). This week’s episode saw the end of Jen, who was way too much of a crybaby anyway, and the final 2 (Rock and Bonnie will square off next week for Mr. Ramsay’s respect, and the keys to the Green Valley Resort kitchen.

My guiltiest pleasure? The show that reserves my spot in the stupidest part of hell? That would be Rock of Love, the VH1 drivel that puts Poison lead-singer Bret Michaels in a house with some of the skankiest gals you’ve ever seen and begs the question: Will Bret find true love? I'm not sure if he actually can considering they would have to live forever--sorry this dude looks like a vampire to me, I'm pretty sure he stole those piercing blue eyes from Lestat himself. Some of the girls are just tattooed and crazy (Jes and Lacey), some are downright stupid and slutty (Heather and Brandi C), and then there is Cindy aka "Rodeo" who intrigues me more than any other contestant because I swear to god she is pushing 50. She looks like Bret’s rowdy aunt that used to strip by the airport. It may be lowest common denominator fodder even trashier than Flavor of Love, but dammit if I can’t wait for the next episode.



Jared said...

Full House live? That sounds all kinds of awesome. I'll have to keep my ears open for repeat performances.

And Chef Ramsey did the stand up thing by sending Julia to culinary school. I would love for her to come back next season as his sous chef.

Are you looking forward to Kitchen Nightmares this fall? I caught some BBC episodes and it looks great.

ed said...

heh. so true. Why can't I look away from Rock of Love? And god bless VH1 for re-running it constantly so I can watch, re-watch and analyze for ever and ever and ever...